I hate it when life just takes all the wind from your sails, just when you think you're doing well. I write this, late tonight, because I can't sleep, and I just don't know what to do. I wish I had an easy solution. Those who know me know what this is probably about. Those who don't, well, I just don't want to say, because I'm sure I'll feel worse for it. If any of you believe, pray for me. My family just decided on a change in direction for life, and this happens. I know God will help us through, so I thank Him for this challenge, and pray that he gives me the wisdom, grace, patience, and courage to trust him for everything.
It's really out of my hands. But He knows best. He sees how it will turn out. He knows how it will benefit the kingdom, even if it doesn't benefit me. I don't want to take the Job point of view on this ("Though He slay me, I will hope in Him. Nevertheles I will argue my ways before Him.") I'm done arguing my ways, because I know I'm not in His will. I have nothing to argue. I trust Him simply because I know he won't slay me. I have to trust in Him, because I have really no choice.
Please pray for me. Pray that I will see God's wonder worked in my life.
Amen.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Thursday, June 15, 2006
It's not mine
As I continue reading It's Not About Me, by Max Lucado, I keep realizing the truth about life. The chapter I was reading today reminded that everything that I have, that I call mine, isn't really mine. What I have, came from HIM. What is currently in my posession, is from HIS hand, given to me. Why has it been given to me? So that I can give Him all the glory for it.
Then why do I have pain? Same reason. If we are healed, it showcases HIS power. If we suffer for HIS sake, it highlights HIS sovereignty. If we show the joy of the LORD, even in our sufferings, take on HIS peace, we point to heaven and shout, "HE is LORD above all, through all, and in all!"
Looking back, I see the greatest example of this in my own life. My dad passed away four years ago, a victim of Ideopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis (IPF). You may have heard of this before, or you may have only become aware of it now that some more well known have been diagnosed with it. (Bill Bright and Jerry Lewis are the two that come to mind.) But through it all, my dad's faith remained firm. He knew he was assured of glory. He was frustrated with the disease, but never cursed God for it (as Job was asked to do by his "friends"). The thing he said that made the biggest impact to me was related to me by my mother as he left Mayo Clinic after being told the chances of his survival of the disease: "Well, you have to die from something."
Even now, writing those words, I see that GOD's peace was in my dad. He didn't argue, didn't complain. He accepted what would later prove to be correct. But he attended church each Sunday, and prayed and read GOD's word every day. He glorified GOD even unto his death. Unfortunately, I didn't realize what he was showing me until recently, looking back. It wasn't about him. He wasn't cursing GOD at his death. He never lost his faith. And heaven was rejoicing when he finaly was home with his LORD.
With that image in mind, I go out and thank GOD that I live this life for HIM, and hope that I seldom forget that.
Peace to you all.
Then why do I have pain? Same reason. If we are healed, it showcases HIS power. If we suffer for HIS sake, it highlights HIS sovereignty. If we show the joy of the LORD, even in our sufferings, take on HIS peace, we point to heaven and shout, "HE is LORD above all, through all, and in all!"
Looking back, I see the greatest example of this in my own life. My dad passed away four years ago, a victim of Ideopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis (IPF). You may have heard of this before, or you may have only become aware of it now that some more well known have been diagnosed with it. (Bill Bright and Jerry Lewis are the two that come to mind.) But through it all, my dad's faith remained firm. He knew he was assured of glory. He was frustrated with the disease, but never cursed God for it (as Job was asked to do by his "friends"). The thing he said that made the biggest impact to me was related to me by my mother as he left Mayo Clinic after being told the chances of his survival of the disease: "Well, you have to die from something."
Even now, writing those words, I see that GOD's peace was in my dad. He didn't argue, didn't complain. He accepted what would later prove to be correct. But he attended church each Sunday, and prayed and read GOD's word every day. He glorified GOD even unto his death. Unfortunately, I didn't realize what he was showing me until recently, looking back. It wasn't about him. He wasn't cursing GOD at his death. He never lost his faith. And heaven was rejoicing when he finaly was home with his LORD.
With that image in mind, I go out and thank GOD that I live this life for HIM, and hope that I seldom forget that.
Peace to you all.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
We are like ants (sort of)
As I was walking from the bus stop to work today, I came upon a strange gathering of animals. Ants, litterally thousands of them, were congregated in a line about 10 feet long along the sidewalk. I glanced at them, smiled at this odd behaviour, thought of how many I could kill with a single step of my size 13 foot, and then walked on by. Then a thought occurred to me.
Isn't God alot like that? Or at least, couldn't he be?
He looks down at us, like ants, but, oddly enough (or perhaps not odd at all), He doesn't have those same thoughts about us. As a matter of fact, He did something completely opposite. He tried, for millenia, to show Himself to us, to tens of thousands of us at times. And when that didn't get our attention, he did something even greater, nobler, humbler... He became one of us! He didn't have to, but for His glory, He did.
At first, I thought how it would be similar for us to become one of those ants. But then I realized, it's a similar, but not even close to perfect, comparison. First of all, the differences between man and ant are infinitely smaller than between God and man. Second, man did not create the ants, but God created both ant and man. It is infinitely more impressive that a God so big that He completely astounds the senses, so infinite that most just dismiss Him as fantasy, or worse, a crutch. We are all so inclined that the universe revolves around ourselves (thank God it doesn't!) or at least that is the deep, inner thought of it all. Just imagine that the whole of everything exists for you, and that you have full control of it all as well. That's too much for my poor little brain to comprehend.
I also came into the understanding that everything I could take pride in, I have no claim to. My brain, my talents, aren't mine at all, but just on loan from God so that I can point to back to Him. They're His, not mine. They never have been mine. I can't take credit for my humour, my voice, my intellect. Without Him, I'd be goo, nothing more.
If you all are wondering where all this comes from, I'm reading a wonderful book written by Max Lucado, called It's Not About Me. And the message it has, I never thought I'd be so thirsty to hear. It takes the burden off of trying to be good, and allows me to focus on Him, and behold Him, take Him in with all my senses. Experience Him. Then I can go out and fully reflect him, like the moon does the sun. Like Moses did after he caught a glimpse of the back of God on Mount Sinai. I can then stop caring about what others think, and where the money will come from, and just get out of the way so that God can be God.
Yes, I know that sounds an awful like giving God permission, and He never needs permission. And getting in the way seems alot like we can stop His plan, which we can't. But God, even though we are really vastly unimportant in His plan, and I mean that in a good way, loves us and gives us the choice to do what He wants now, or learn out why it's not good to not do what He says later. We cannot hinder His plan, but we can put ourselves on the outside, for a while, while He teaches us by or mistakes and pain, which is ,of course, also His plan.
Right about now is where I start to get absolutely dizzy about who God really is! I cannot fathom His nature. And when I do hear it explained, rather than clarifying things, it leaves me more in awe. Finite man CANNOT fathom God. He's just too......everything to be comprehended. And the great thing is, we don't have to! We just have to know enough about Him to realize that there is no other word for Him than God.
When the Hebrew authors of the Old Testament called Him "holy", they were using the word qadosh which means "cut off" or "seperate". He is not just seperate from us, he is seperate from everything. Nothing else is like Him! He always speaks of Himself in the present tense, whether speaking to us of the past or the future. While we were, He says, "I AM." When we will be, He again says, "I AM."
Even the way Jesus spoke of himself when he tells the Sanhedrin, "Before Abraham was, I am." declares that he is not only God, but also speaks that while we may know hours, days, years, decades, centuries, millenia, and epochs, God is before them, and after them, and throughout them. There really are no days or years for Him. All times are the same! Try to even begin to imagine that!!! It's impossible!
I cannot even begin to tell all of the riches I've mined from this book here. The more I read this book, the more I'm moved to...to something I don't even have a word to describe! It's all in His word, the Bible, but I've only caught the briefest glimpse of it before! Oh, that I could go back and see it all this clearly when I was still young and bypass all the pain that my years have shown me! But even in the pain, God is showing me the greatest love! He is moulding me, forming me, shaping me, creating me into the tool He wants me to be. And not for my joy or my pleasure, but so that I can rejoice in Him and point to Him as the beginning and ending of everything!
I feel as if I could write on this for hours upon hours, but I feel I have to come back to this later. But let me leave you with this, from Paul, to comfort you if you are troubled or in pain.
In 2nd Corinthians 4:17, Paul writes of the reward of heaven, but also explains how he feels about the trials of this life. He writes that all our struggles are "...our light affliction, which is for but a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory" (NKJV). Paul had been "beaten times without number, often in danger of death." He was given the "thirty-nine lashes" by the Jews five times. He was even stoned and left for dead outside the city. In addition, he had been shipwrecked three times, and spent at least a day in the middle of the sea. And yet he called it "our light affliction, which is but for a moment!" this was the rest of his life, and it ended in his execution. That is what looking "full in His wonderful face" can do for you. This life is "but a moment" in light of the glorious eternity to be spent with Him.
I'll be back, I'm sure, to toss all of this out there. Thank you Max Lucado, for being a tool for God to reach me on the message I needed to hear the most. But then, it's not about you or me, is it?
Isn't God alot like that? Or at least, couldn't he be?
He looks down at us, like ants, but, oddly enough (or perhaps not odd at all), He doesn't have those same thoughts about us. As a matter of fact, He did something completely opposite. He tried, for millenia, to show Himself to us, to tens of thousands of us at times. And when that didn't get our attention, he did something even greater, nobler, humbler... He became one of us! He didn't have to, but for His glory, He did.
At first, I thought how it would be similar for us to become one of those ants. But then I realized, it's a similar, but not even close to perfect, comparison. First of all, the differences between man and ant are infinitely smaller than between God and man. Second, man did not create the ants, but God created both ant and man. It is infinitely more impressive that a God so big that He completely astounds the senses, so infinite that most just dismiss Him as fantasy, or worse, a crutch. We are all so inclined that the universe revolves around ourselves (thank God it doesn't!) or at least that is the deep, inner thought of it all. Just imagine that the whole of everything exists for you, and that you have full control of it all as well. That's too much for my poor little brain to comprehend.
I also came into the understanding that everything I could take pride in, I have no claim to. My brain, my talents, aren't mine at all, but just on loan from God so that I can point to back to Him. They're His, not mine. They never have been mine. I can't take credit for my humour, my voice, my intellect. Without Him, I'd be goo, nothing more.
If you all are wondering where all this comes from, I'm reading a wonderful book written by Max Lucado, called It's Not About Me. And the message it has, I never thought I'd be so thirsty to hear. It takes the burden off of trying to be good, and allows me to focus on Him, and behold Him, take Him in with all my senses. Experience Him. Then I can go out and fully reflect him, like the moon does the sun. Like Moses did after he caught a glimpse of the back of God on Mount Sinai. I can then stop caring about what others think, and where the money will come from, and just get out of the way so that God can be God.
Yes, I know that sounds an awful like giving God permission, and He never needs permission. And getting in the way seems alot like we can stop His plan, which we can't. But God, even though we are really vastly unimportant in His plan, and I mean that in a good way, loves us and gives us the choice to do what He wants now, or learn out why it's not good to not do what He says later. We cannot hinder His plan, but we can put ourselves on the outside, for a while, while He teaches us by or mistakes and pain, which is ,of course, also His plan.
Right about now is where I start to get absolutely dizzy about who God really is! I cannot fathom His nature. And when I do hear it explained, rather than clarifying things, it leaves me more in awe. Finite man CANNOT fathom God. He's just too......everything to be comprehended. And the great thing is, we don't have to! We just have to know enough about Him to realize that there is no other word for Him than God.
When the Hebrew authors of the Old Testament called Him "holy", they were using the word qadosh which means "cut off" or "seperate". He is not just seperate from us, he is seperate from everything. Nothing else is like Him! He always speaks of Himself in the present tense, whether speaking to us of the past or the future. While we were, He says, "I AM." When we will be, He again says, "I AM."
Even the way Jesus spoke of himself when he tells the Sanhedrin, "Before Abraham was, I am." declares that he is not only God, but also speaks that while we may know hours, days, years, decades, centuries, millenia, and epochs, God is before them, and after them, and throughout them. There really are no days or years for Him. All times are the same! Try to even begin to imagine that!!! It's impossible!
I cannot even begin to tell all of the riches I've mined from this book here. The more I read this book, the more I'm moved to...to something I don't even have a word to describe! It's all in His word, the Bible, but I've only caught the briefest glimpse of it before! Oh, that I could go back and see it all this clearly when I was still young and bypass all the pain that my years have shown me! But even in the pain, God is showing me the greatest love! He is moulding me, forming me, shaping me, creating me into the tool He wants me to be. And not for my joy or my pleasure, but so that I can rejoice in Him and point to Him as the beginning and ending of everything!
I feel as if I could write on this for hours upon hours, but I feel I have to come back to this later. But let me leave you with this, from Paul, to comfort you if you are troubled or in pain.
In 2nd Corinthians 4:17, Paul writes of the reward of heaven, but also explains how he feels about the trials of this life. He writes that all our struggles are "...our light affliction, which is for but a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory" (NKJV). Paul had been "beaten times without number, often in danger of death." He was given the "thirty-nine lashes" by the Jews five times. He was even stoned and left for dead outside the city. In addition, he had been shipwrecked three times, and spent at least a day in the middle of the sea. And yet he called it "our light affliction, which is but for a moment!" this was the rest of his life, and it ended in his execution. That is what looking "full in His wonderful face" can do for you. This life is "but a moment" in light of the glorious eternity to be spent with Him.
I'll be back, I'm sure, to toss all of this out there. Thank you Max Lucado, for being a tool for God to reach me on the message I needed to hear the most. But then, it's not about you or me, is it?
Saturday, June 3, 2006
Oh, the joys of parenthood.
Yesterday night, after bringing my kids home from a friends home, because my wife went out of town with our church group, was a lovely night. The kids slept really well. We had fun in the morning, and set out to water our garden before heading to the Children's Museum... That was before Our Dear Son had an attack of the Terrible Threes...
While at the garden, while my daughter and I were watering the plants, he decided to start watering himself. Ok, I know that sounds like nothing, but he was watering himself, not the plants. Fortunately, he didn't pull any weeds this time... Last time, he pulled up one of our bean plants. Oh, well. He's three, after all. What can I expect?
Well, after we got home, I placed him and his sister in the bath to wash off their feet and hands, only about an inch or two of water in the tub. I turn my back for a moment, and what does the boy do? Sits down in the water and starts playing, fully clothed... So, it's time for a bath. Now I still hope we can get to the Children's Museum, but with having to pick up my wife about 4:30 pm today, I don't know how long we'll have... I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
God,
Give me patience with my son. He's learning just who he is, and I have to help him as best I can. Help me to be gentle when dealing with him.
In Christ's Name,
Amen
While at the garden, while my daughter and I were watering the plants, he decided to start watering himself. Ok, I know that sounds like nothing, but he was watering himself, not the plants. Fortunately, he didn't pull any weeds this time... Last time, he pulled up one of our bean plants. Oh, well. He's three, after all. What can I expect?
Well, after we got home, I placed him and his sister in the bath to wash off their feet and hands, only about an inch or two of water in the tub. I turn my back for a moment, and what does the boy do? Sits down in the water and starts playing, fully clothed... So, it's time for a bath. Now I still hope we can get to the Children's Museum, but with having to pick up my wife about 4:30 pm today, I don't know how long we'll have... I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
God,
Give me patience with my son. He's learning just who he is, and I have to help him as best I can. Help me to be gentle when dealing with him.
In Christ's Name,
Amen
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